Soymilk Hippy Girlfriend

I've had a bit of a dry spell with responses. Perhaps my letters are getting a little over the top. But that's sort of the fun of it.
Over the next few days, I'll be posting some of the letters that probably got pinned up next to the water cooler, but never got a response.

"Dear Nutrisoya

I'm writing to discuss your Natura soy milk.

I've been dating a woman for the past couple of years. She's a keeper if you ask me. She's fit, health conscious, and has a fantastic sense of humor.
However, in the past months she's changed. And I'm convinced your soy milk may have something to do with it.

Her sex drive has plummeted. It's almost impossible to initiate any type of intimate contact with her. Though frankly, I'm not so interested either, as she's stopped shaving her armpits, or legs, and refuses to shower more than 3 times a week. In addition to this, she's developed terrible habits such as clipping her toe nails in the living room, and using "alternative" forms of deoderant (which I can tell you, do not work) If I don't clean her clothes, they just don't get cleaned, and she has stopped eating meat all together, which troubles me, because all she eats now is vegetables. That CANT be good for you.

Anyway, the reason I'm writing you is that this all started about 6 months ago when she started drinking your soy milk. Now, don't get me wrong... I love your soymilk. Especially the unsweetened variety. But I've been doing research on the internet about soy products, and have repeatedly found reports that it causes hormonal imbalances when excessive amounts are introduced into the diet. My girlfriend drinks about 2 liters of the stuff a day. And I'm convinced it has something to do with her behavior. I've been drinking more of it, if only to prevent her from drinking it, sacrificing my own health in the process.

I urge you to put my mind at ease. I don't know what else to do.

Truly
-Peter"